Everyone is a part of a family, no matter who you are. At the very least, you do have two parents, whether they are living or dead, a part of your daily life or estranged, every person on earth is part of a family.
We've been talking about Family Life in our series at Christ Church, titled Family Guys & Gals, and today, the subject is the single life. There are all kinds of biases and prejudices against single people in our society. They are stigmatized and villianized. People who are single, past a certain age, are believed to have some kind of character flaw or moral defect. They are considered strange, weird, and out of the mainstream.
In a way, they are out of the mainstream because statisticians tell us that 9 out of 10 of us will be married at some point during our adult life. So, the 1 out of 10 is viewed with suspicion just because they are in the minority. I'm afraid our world does not have the greatest track record with minorities.
However, no matter what the world says, the Single Life can be as a fulfilling and content a life as any other. The world doesn't value singleness, but God certainly does. One of the Scriptures I quoted in my message was:
“Sometimes I wish everyone were single like me – a simpler life in many ways! But celibacy is not for everyone any more than marriage is. God gives the gift of single life to some and the gift of married life to others.” 1 Corinthians 7:7 (Msg)
This is the Apostle Paul, a man who more than likely understood both the married life and the single life. Because of his advancement in the Jewish leadership of his day, he was almost certainly married. However, because of statements like this in 1 Corinthians, during Paul's Christian ministry, which was the vast majority of his adult life, he was single, most likely widowed.
Singleness is seen as a gift from God. Single people enjoy certain freedoms that married people simply cannot, if they did, they wouldn't stay married very long! Paul says here that he wishes everyone were single and able to devote more of their time to the mission of God. But Paul was a pragmatist and realized that sexual temptation is just too strong for most people to endure a lifetime of celibacy.
It's really unfortunate that even some in the church elevate marriage far beyond what the Scripture does, to the point of ostracizing, whether intentionally or not, those who do not fit into the traditional nuclear family. Jesus said, "who is my mother, and who are my brothers?" Then he answered his own question by saying, "whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother." (see Matthew 12:48-50).
You've heard the saying, "Blood is thicker than water." Jesus' changed it, "The blood of Christ is thicker than blood." The ultimate familial relations are not found in marriage, but in the household of God. Marriage doesn't exist in eternity, but the Church does.
This is opening a bunch of cans of worms! More than I can write about, now. Needless to say, the values of the world have infiltrated church life. We need to get back to the Bible, so to speak, and learn God's values. Family is huge. Marriage is vital. But it is not for everyone. Those who are single are just as valuable as anyone. We, who have been blessed by God in so many ways, need to recognize and celebrate this diversity of human experience. Single people need to feel like they matter, that they are important, that they have a contribution to make, and be free within the Church to express their giftedness and strengths for the glory of the Kingdom of God.
Everyone is a part of a family. We're all a part of an earthly family, and some of those are better than others. But, we are also all a part of the family of God. We belong to him. We are all his children. So, let's honor this reality in our relationships with one another, no matter how different we might think we are!
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